A bit of me is still stuck in last year. It is hard to admit, but there are still somethings that need to be addressed. It's kind of a funny feeling knowing that a new year has begun, and the prognosticator in me wants to plan for every eventuality that I will face in 2017. I like to think ahead, it's a natural thing for me. I want to let go of some things but I am not sure what to really let go of. Life can make us feel like we are alone sometimes, when all around us there is life going on. It is in flashes of brilliance, or just awareness that we become aware that we are not running the show, and that our little voice matters only as much as our words have meaning. In 2016, I found my voice and I'm not sure what that voice is going to look like here and now.
They say that there is no better time than the present moment, and a part of me is sort of feeling like a child. I did a lot of inner child work personally by myself in 2016 and what I am learning now is that that inner child has become a year older. Feeling that innocence is a precious thing, and it is something to be protected, there is somewhat of an cloud, not iCloud hanging over the mental roof of my mind, waiting to disperse. I was up early this morning, and as the fog covered my street, I anticipated it leaving my mind. There can be security in not knowing somethings, and I think depression has a relationship to this. When we are not at peace with ourselves, or should I say when I am not resting in my own inner peace, I have the feeling that there is some is something wrong with me. Life has a way of slapping you in the face, punching you in the gut, and bullying you sometimes, but it's those moments when you feel like laughing (or crying) that you fully rest in the present.
I don't think that the present moment is so much as a feeling, than it is a state of being. But if you try to just be, you can get pretty frustrated pretty quickly. I have questions, we all do, of what happens next and the dissonance that these questions create can make us feel edgy. A restless mind, is a mind that is dissatisfied with it's present condition or circumstances. It fights to see through the mental fog of sameness or monotony. There is nothing wrong with stability, in fact I desire it, or at lest I think I do, but when the unpredictable becomes predictable, we get frustrated.
There is a mystery to faith, at least I think there should be. We forget sometimes that we live in a world where somethings are predictable, and I think that it is these things that gives us most comfort. We make an effort to make it to work on time, to pick up our kids, to cook dinner, to go to church. When old things become new I really don't think that it is all in our minds, but the battle is in our minds. To feel disconnected is not to feel lonely, but it can mean that. To feel disconnected feels like you are missing out on something, and that something is something that is really big to us. I don't think that Adam and Eve really knew the consequences of separating themselves from God's presence, but I'm sure they "got it" after they sinned. It was like their lives had changed forever, and their mind state I'm sure was one of dissonance, not peace.
We are like our first parents, in that we too feel separation at times, and it is painful. The reason why I am attracted to religion is because we all desire full connection to the God who created us, and that is done by faith. To be religious, means to believe in something bigger than yourself. It can be confused with imagination, but to me and millions of others, faith is very real. I truly believe with all my heart that faith cannot deceive you, the opposite of faith is unbelief and it's one or the other. When life reveals it's mysteries to us, we should be grateful, not fear. Fear can be stifling to creativity or faith, but it is a legitimate human emotion.
Emotions matter, and if you believe in God, or if you have faith, you should let yourself experience the full range of emotions, including fear. Fear can push us to action, we can find ourselves doing miraculous things when we act out of fear. When we experience love for example, we can feel all kinds of emotions, including fear. So just go with it. Fear doesn't have to be a sin if it pushes us to positive action, I have experienced that, even as I write. So why is it so hard to let go?
We might fear that joy that we have been so longing to feel in our lives, but up untill this point have not let our fear push us to it. This is Mike.
They say that there is no better time than the present moment, and a part of me is sort of feeling like a child. I did a lot of inner child work personally by myself in 2016 and what I am learning now is that that inner child has become a year older. Feeling that innocence is a precious thing, and it is something to be protected, there is somewhat of an cloud, not iCloud hanging over the mental roof of my mind, waiting to disperse. I was up early this morning, and as the fog covered my street, I anticipated it leaving my mind. There can be security in not knowing somethings, and I think depression has a relationship to this. When we are not at peace with ourselves, or should I say when I am not resting in my own inner peace, I have the feeling that there is some is something wrong with me. Life has a way of slapping you in the face, punching you in the gut, and bullying you sometimes, but it's those moments when you feel like laughing (or crying) that you fully rest in the present.
I don't think that the present moment is so much as a feeling, than it is a state of being. But if you try to just be, you can get pretty frustrated pretty quickly. I have questions, we all do, of what happens next and the dissonance that these questions create can make us feel edgy. A restless mind, is a mind that is dissatisfied with it's present condition or circumstances. It fights to see through the mental fog of sameness or monotony. There is nothing wrong with stability, in fact I desire it, or at lest I think I do, but when the unpredictable becomes predictable, we get frustrated.
There is a mystery to faith, at least I think there should be. We forget sometimes that we live in a world where somethings are predictable, and I think that it is these things that gives us most comfort. We make an effort to make it to work on time, to pick up our kids, to cook dinner, to go to church. When old things become new I really don't think that it is all in our minds, but the battle is in our minds. To feel disconnected is not to feel lonely, but it can mean that. To feel disconnected feels like you are missing out on something, and that something is something that is really big to us. I don't think that Adam and Eve really knew the consequences of separating themselves from God's presence, but I'm sure they "got it" after they sinned. It was like their lives had changed forever, and their mind state I'm sure was one of dissonance, not peace.
We are like our first parents, in that we too feel separation at times, and it is painful. The reason why I am attracted to religion is because we all desire full connection to the God who created us, and that is done by faith. To be religious, means to believe in something bigger than yourself. It can be confused with imagination, but to me and millions of others, faith is very real. I truly believe with all my heart that faith cannot deceive you, the opposite of faith is unbelief and it's one or the other. When life reveals it's mysteries to us, we should be grateful, not fear. Fear can be stifling to creativity or faith, but it is a legitimate human emotion.
Emotions matter, and if you believe in God, or if you have faith, you should let yourself experience the full range of emotions, including fear. Fear can push us to action, we can find ourselves doing miraculous things when we act out of fear. When we experience love for example, we can feel all kinds of emotions, including fear. So just go with it. Fear doesn't have to be a sin if it pushes us to positive action, I have experienced that, even as I write. So why is it so hard to let go?
We might fear that joy that we have been so longing to feel in our lives, but up untill this point have not let our fear push us to it. This is Mike.
Comments
Post a Comment